The last week has been interesting. I don't consider myself a counselor or even super "wise", but I am learning about the power, blessing, hope, and growth of Christ in my life. In my life experience, I have learned lessons on life purpose, grace and mercy, love and faith... I do my best to return to Scripture as my guide and how the Lord has "proved" himself to me and those in my life.
Is seeking out new relationships with people like my brothers or childhood girlfriends with the intent of being their friend okay? I care about their happiness and their relationships with the Lord (and other people). I guess I feel that I do have advice to offer and that the Lord can "answer" their questions if they let Him. Not that He will take away all their pain and suffering right away, but that He gives Himself and it truly IS enough. But it's so hard to know what to say or not to say. Hard not to "tell" them what to or not to do.
While I know that I am married, my husband's occupation has taught me that the Lord has to be the person to give my life purpose. God is the one I need to seek to please above all else and becoming like His Son, Jesus Christ. My daughters look up to me with even more expectation and less question than my peers did during my childhood and adolescence. But even more than that, my true joy is to be found in seeking after and knowing Him.
I'm not sure how to or if I should be sharing what I'm learning.... I don't dare claim to know all the answers or what they are going through.... I don't mean to be heartless and insensitive or to speak "christian-ese" at them. I'm not always faithful or trusting in the Lord's goodness or purposes. I don't read my Bible daily. I find myself praying only when reminded, as opposed to constantly. I've made mistakes and tainted my reputation with most of them by how I courted and married my husband. And then there's that aspect of "the Asian culture." Are they being polite? Do they actually care what I'm saying? Do they care about what I have to say? Am I speaking for my own benefit or theirs and am I speaking the truth or simply my opinion? That last question is probably the biggest one that I have right now.
I've had 3 pretty heavy conversations in the last 4 days... and not just "one time" things. They have the potential and almost need to be followed up and "seen through" which equals: relationships. Those take time and energy and resources and patience. They can reap great rewards but also drain many aspects of one's life.
God, please grant me Your wisdom and help me to sift out my understanding. Thank You for these opportunities. Thank You for these "second chance" friendships. Please be with these people as they struggle and hurt and seek You. I know You promise to, so I implore You to submerge them in Your love, peace, joy, and hope! Guide my heart and mind, use my mouth and arms as Yours! I love these people and want them to feel Your love and joy for them, too! =) Your humble daughter, Amy Joy.